Kim and I attempt to educate long before resorting to punishment but increasingly we find that swift justice erupts as the kiddos become volatile. For Olivia, timeouts are becoming increasingly useless. The last time she was put in timeout, it was for repeatedly dismounting from her chair at the dinner table. She flitted around the table, her mouth half full, chewing, talking, and food falling to the floor. Mimi, our beloved family dog, vacuumed up after her. Kim gave the kid a warning and Olivia disregarded the last chance by bouncing off her chair only seconds after the ultimatum was issued. Kim escorted Olivia to the designated timeout spot where she quietly sat. Four minutes passed and Kim paroled Olivia only to have the detainee willingly stay incarcerated for three times the length of her original imprisonment. Similar to lifelong criminals who decide it’s better on the inside then in the real world.
Since that time, I decided we must try an alternate discipline strategy; revoking privileges. Take away what toys or objects 
they love the most for a whole day, sometimes longer or until they can earn them back. Kim and I have instilled the belief that their toys are privileges which is actually a good because I think most of these brats today feel they are entitled to anything and everything. It is working for the time being, but I can see into the future and what I know is this; one day the kiddos will have the revelation that they will be able to survive without anything but the things that sustain them. Obvouisly, I’ll refrain from deprivation of basic necessities as a punishment mechanism. Olivia is starting to figure that out already. Just tonight, on their first offence, I had removed their reading lights, meaning no more books for the night and all the stuffed animals that they sleep with on a second violation. I had threatened that if they couldn’t follow the night time rules of no jumping, no screaming, no throwing and no leaving their room (except to use the potty or for an emergency), the next thing I would be removing was their radio. And books-on-CD are a hot commodity.
Questioning what was next at stake, Olivia wondered what I would nix after the radio, “And after that… my ponies?”
I had to think about it for a minute because Olivia has a team of imaginary ponies, “No, I can’t take your imagination away from you.” It is only a matter of time before their room is stripped naked except for beds, covers and bedside cups of water.
***
Unless Hailey is on the brink of utter exhaustion, her body is in constant motion, so timeouts still work as a deterrent on her. Except for this morning:
Hailey is currently going through a sliver tongue, pursed lip spitting stage. Delighted with an annoying substitute for speaking, she involuntarily sprays saliva as means of communication.
Me: “Morning kiddo. How about some milk?”
Hailey: “Plblblulth”
Me: “No spiting Hailey. That’s disrespectful”
Hailey: “Plblblulth”
Me: “You spit again and you’re in timeout!”
Hailey: “Plblblulth”
Me: “Ok, you’re in timeout for spiting and for disrespecting me!!”
Hailey: “Plblblulth”
Me: “You can take yourself to timeout or I will take you there!!!”
Hailey: “Plblblulth”
Me: “You sit on this spot for three minutes. You’re in timeout for spitting and being disrespectful!!!” I run to the kitchen and slam several cups of milky grind-and-brew coffee. Three short minutes pass. I squat down eye level with Hailey and assume a sweet caring dad role.
Me: “Ok Hailey, why are you in timeout?”
Hailey: “Plblblulth. Plblblulth. Plblblulth.”
Irony is difficult to interpret coming from a three year old at seven o’clock in the morning.
