“10 Secrets Every Father Should Know” Is the sub title of this book. Head’s up, there is no outline for the 10 secrets. However there are 10 chapters in the book, so I assume those are the 10 secrets that the sub title refers too. The beginning of the book is packed full of statistics pertaining to early childhood/teen depression, sexual activity, drug use, alcohol usage, and media influence, all of which are constantly marketed to our daughters. The following information is a reference to the astoundingly healthy effects that daughters with a close relationship to their fathers have on both the child and the parent. Great news for all the good dads out there who appreciate, initiate and carve out time to spend with the family.
The 10 secrets, err, chapters are:
“You are the most important man in her life” My head got big reading this.
“She needs a hero” Yes, my girls need someone to look up too, I agree and that hero should be me.
“You are her first love” I can see that with my girls, sure.
“Teach her humility” The author doesn’t specifically say how to do this (or give specific instruction on anything in the book for that matter), I do think that this a good piece of advice for keeping my girls grounded and may help them to realize that they are not entitled to everything and anything.
“Protect her and defend her” This one is kind of obvious.
“Pragmatism and grit: Two of your greatest assets” Ok this was the best line from the book ‘…there are two types of women in the world: princesses and pioneer women.’ I agree with that and this was possibly the most influential chapter in the book.
“Be the man you want her to marry” Model what you hope she will look for in a husband, good recommendation.
“Teach her who god is” The book just took a huge right turn as the author specifically sites the Judeo-Christian tradition and ostracizes half the world. Being of Jewish background I can relate to the types of values she is talking about, however Dr. Meeker alienates every other religion with her narrow-minded statements.
“Teach her to fight” I like this secret, but it is not about signing young girls up for classes at the local Tea Kwan Do studio, this is regarding finding a balance between feelings, reason and will.
“Keep her connected” This one is about spending quality one-on-on time with each other and creating powerful memories. Good advice.
The author of the book is well qualified (twenty years) in pediatric medicine and makes references to counseling many families. She sites compelling eye-opening facts and makes persuasive arguments for the importance of influential fathers. One thing the author is not; believable. Doctor Meeker supports detailed information with fabricated Chicken Soup-ish stories from pseudo (or possibly a culmination of) patients. Each chapter contains one or two of these transparent page filler tales. I found these crumbs of fiction to be a distraction from the guts of the message and discredits the author’s authority. What kind of doctor brazenly severs their patient’s confidentiality? The scant fragments of sincerity were imbedded within the commentary from the author’s personal relationships with her father and husband.
My suggestion, check the book out at the local library like I did and skip the fluff because this book does have some great points validating the importance of fathers and the profound effects we have on our daughters.
Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters by Meg Meeker, M.D.
Published by Regnery Publishing, Inc.
Copyright 2006
